Cicadas are edible

27 Jun

Yahoo! tells me cicadas are not only going to be abundant this summer, but they are going to serve as an afternoon snack for people too lazy to go to the store and get a real snack like food that’s not a bug-eyed red annoying buzzing monstrous insect. My rule: if the snack woke me up at night for the wrong reasons, it’s going off the menu. I don’t care what kind of delicious treat cicadas make, after all of these years of irritating me – I’m not giving them the satisfaction of knowing they satiated my appetite.


Soapy Water

26 Jun

I have this University of Texas mug that I rarely use due to me not being of those ‘school pride, bro’ type of guys. Regardless, it’s a solid mug that serves mug-like purposes and I use it around the house when I am doing dishes and have no cups left.

University of Texas mug

Solid mug that serves its intended purpose

So I was cleaning up around my house and noticed there were instructions for the mug.

My initial thoughts were: how ridiculous that someone would need instructions on how to use a mug, but then I realized they were instructions on how to clean the mug and while that is an equally ridiculous inclusion, it is a lot more logical inclusion.

Instructions on how to clean the mug

Don't worry if you can't read it - I couldn't take a picture clear enough for you to see anything. Needless to say, 'soapy water' is there.

The first general suggestion the mug gives on how to properly clean your drinkwear is to wash all parts in warm soapy water before using. That got me thinking: do we not have a more mature word for soapy water than….soapy water?

Yes – the name does give away exactly what it wants you to use and is an accurate description of the combination of soap and water, but with all the words we have for inane items, did we just give up when it came to soap-water?

They have a council in France to come up with words and we couldn’t have developed a more scientific sounding name than ‘soapy water’? I bet ‘soapy water’ has created a lot of confusion over the years due to people being embarrassed to use the word even if they need to use the word in proper context.

Struggle all you want my friends – the instructions for my mug reaffirmed the fact that soapy water is the correct term for soap-water and we (you) are just going to have to deal with using the term ‘soapy water’ forever.

Usman Ahmed aka Uzzy – The Greatest Boxer Ever

25 Jun

A big thanks to Scott Van Pelt for putting me up on Usman Ahmed aka Uzzy, who puts on one of the greatest performances in boxing  history.  Even if you don’t like rap music, or awful dance moves, please watch the entirety of this video.  You will not be disappointed.  The title of biggest boxing tragedy ever is a gigantic misnomer; this is one of the greatest accomplishments in boxing history.

Bagel Bites

23 Jun

Bagel Bites still exist? I must have missed the memo that 18 years after I was interested in having bagel bites, the youth of america is still inrigued enough by these awful pizza-bagel hybrids to keep the product rolling out.

Bagel Bites

If one of your crowning achievements is having 'real cheese' you probably aren't delivering a quality product.

“When you have pizza on a bagel….you can eat pizza any time!”

Best crossover in NBA history

22 Jun

Southwest Airlines has good customer service?

22 Jun

My reaction to the following report:

plain face

I wear beanies when it's 90-degrees outside

You know the economy is doing bad when….

Southwest Airlines and Pizza Hut have been named as the customer-satisfaction leaders in their respective industries.


So the basic process at Pizza Hut is like “Hey, I’m going to get [insert pizza type here] and I’m going to pick it up” and the person on the other end goes “Eh, alright bro it’s going to be about 30 minutes – see ya then!”

So is the fact it’s such an easy process that no employee, no matter how incompetent, could possibly mess it up the reason why customer satisfaction is so positive?  I have never left a Pizza Hut and gone ‘damn, they really did a great job with their service today, splendid job Pizza Hut.’ If anything, my opinion is usually ‘thanks Pizza Hut for not screwing anything up .’

Same holds for Southwest Airlines.

I think your expectation level is just lower with Southwest Airlines and Pizza Hut. You expect to get average service at a low price. As long as your flight details and pizza aren’t completely fucked up, you generally leave feeling good about the service you received.

In the restaurant category, Olive Garden was right behind Pizza Hut.

Thankfully I haven’t been to an Olive Garden more than twice in my life so I can’t really comment its quality, but I refuse to believe Olive Garden provides a high-quality service. They give you unlimited bread sticks and pasta in hopes that you are too fat to leave the restaurant after lunch and are forced to stay there for dinner. What kind of quality is that?

If you want to read more about the list click here. I pretty much said everything that needs to be said, but if you need proof that what I typed is fact, there ya go.

Impact of Texas budget cuts on education

21 Jun

“Public schools would receive about $4 billion less in state aid compared with what they’d get under current formulas through the next two years. Plus $1.4 billion for other public education programs and instructional materials would be cut.

State funds to higher education would be cut by about $1.2 billion, although that would be softened a bit by funds allocated in separate legislation. Tens of thousands fewer students would get college financial aid than in the current two-year budget period.”

Mind you: we have more than $6 billion in reserve monies in the Rainy Day Funds that we refuse to tap in to. What’s more important: keeping that portion of money untapped so Texas can be seen as a beacon for financial responsiblity, or using our position as the key state in legislating public education to actually maintain a solid foundation for our education system?

There still has to be a special session for the cut in public education to be finalized, but special sessions are basically a rouse where Perry gets to call in his hand-picked favorites to make judgments based on his agenda, so it’s going to get pushed through.

This is going to be the first time since 1949 that Texas will cut funding for public education.  This isn’t just a slight cut, this is a 20-percent cut.

Texas may have the second largest economy in the country, but experts are reporting the initial budget proposal may have cost Texas 300,000 future jobs.

Solid work, Perry.

By the way, the whole Texas is a beacon of financial responsibility thing is tongue-in-cheek.  We’ve recouped 51-percent of jobs lost post-recession compared to 13-percent nationwide yet we have the lowest state spending per capita.  Cutting money for education when 70,000 new kids enroll in Texas schools per day is not going to alleviate any financial crisis.  It’s just going to raise property taxes for local residents and create another dilemma for homeowners.

Good work, Perry.